have you ever imagined and looked forward to something then you just watched it ripped out of your grasp. HEARTACHE?

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• ·        No! not again, why do these things keep happening to you everytime, working so hard and getting all excited and expectant of the imagined happiness then at the last moment, all you could do is to stare at it from a distance as its being ripped out from your grasp. Like there is someone waiting for you to get all emotional and excited about something then laughs and takes it all away from you. All your left with is this void and depression, low self esteem  that you could never have something you dream of. Darkness and misery burning up inside of you. engulfing goosebumps of a broken man. you keep on drawing series of speculations “why”? ‘why me’  ‘why only me’? ‘am I cursed’? ‘or always unlucky’ . like feeding  the tasty aroma of a nice looking meal to a hungry man then watching him imagine, get all excited and expectant then gently carrying it all away right before his eyes. The only positive speculation you draw is that ‘maybe you are meant to be sober so you could pour out these words with your sore heart’. It’s the thoughts that stab you deep every hour you recall them ‘the wonderful connection and closure you always imagine’ ‘secretly craving for that lovely moment to soon be a reality’ ‘planning post events in which you get to boast happily of the imagined happiness’ these very imaginations come back to burn and beat you up over and over again.

• Really thought this last one was gonna finally work out, had your high hopes, you finally had something to look forward to,  for once didn’t create any fault or excuse to run away, you faced it squarely But it just frayed away. ‘are you ever going to get the happiness you’ve been longing for. ‘LIFE GOES ON’ plenty more fish in the sea, let the heartaches burn then go look for another fish
  
  
  . That’s me – soul deep.